Tuesday 11 May 2010

Laughter, is it really the best medicine?

I love to laugh, always have as far as I can remember; although my mum tells me I was quite uptight as a child!  (I'm sure that I will drag some of those stories up later!  One I recall was when my Mum, Dad, Granny and myself were at a swimming pool and there was a slide there and we all went up to have a go.  It said that you could only sit or lie down facing frontwards and there was no sitting backwards etc.  My Mum and Dad went down as norma then I went down like a good girl ( I was only 7 or so at the time.  Then my Granny took her turn.  My Grandad was in a wheelchair and was just sitting watching on the side of the pool.  Well, Granny started off by sitting up, and forwards.  However by the end she had flipped over and spun round and was flying down the slide upside down and backwards.  The worst thing was she could hardly swim and shot out the end of the slide in a whirlpool of disaster and shot out and sunk like a stone.  My dad was diving down to try and get her as mym Mum was hysterically laughing, as was my Grandad sat on the side.  In amidst this all, with totally seriousness said "You're not supposed to come down that way Granny."  My Dad managed to drag her to the surface, she was fine and was laughing herself, probably didint help her at all!  I didnt see the funny side though until I was alot older and laughed at everything!)
My laugh isn't a quiet affair; I have reduced a whole pub to silence and received a round of applause for my laugh once so that gives some idea.  But is laughter the best medicine.  At work today there were a couple of things which ended up reducing the office to raucous laughter.  In my usual way I managed to cause trouble by trying to fish out some biscuit crumbs that I had dropped down my top! This inevitably ended in disaster and led to a couple of funny stories being told and a smile on the face of all the people there.  This is priceless in the workplace where things can be stressed and the jobs really pressured.  It's especially good when you know members or your team are having a tought time in or out of work.
It's not the best medicine I discovered after an operation!  I made my Granny laugh after she had an op on a broken arm and we thought then that laughter wasn't the best medicine.  I discovered this my self after my first operation, where I couln't blink without being in agony.  It was amazing how long I couldn't, and didn't laugh for.  Probably wouldn't have been so long had I not had a laugh santa would be proud of!
My Granny had her own back as when I was out of hospital my Mum brought Wii resort to the house to play to cheer me up.  There weren't many things that I could do on there if they required moving but my Mum and Granny were having a go.  Then suddenly my Granny when she was quietly driving a jet ski, decided to start flying around like a bat out of hell; I have no idea why!  She was hilarious and the pain I was in was unmentionable.  I giggled a bit then started to laugh and it was just too funny, and I then couldnt stop and anything more than a giggle was agony!  I have to say that I was begging her, willing her to stop as I was petrified I was going to burst something.  I was in alot of pain all night but something felt a little better in my heart.  With time I could chuckle more and it definitely felt better when I could!  But for a while there laughter was definitely not the best medicine!,

Monday 10 May 2010

To Breed or not to Breed, now that is a question!

With love comes compromise, decisions and life choices and what do we do if the person we want to be with doesn't want the same things as us.  What do we do if they are everything, but don't want the same things....
How far should we change?
I was recently talking to a male friend of mine who was suprised to hear my gorgeous man doesn't want to get married or have children.  He said the total opposite of what I exptected, which was what are you worried about, and said I am suprised that you are still with him.  That wasn't the male perspective I was hoping for!  I wanted "dont be such a woman and those things dont matter", but he said it must be killing you.  And at that moment I realised it was. 
After having the odd man in my life that were so wrong in so many varied and frightening ways, of course fate would furnish me with an amazing man who was the polar opposite where life choices were concerned.  I am now in a place where I need to make it ok, where I can reconcile this to make it alright, but there is no compromise when it comes to marriage and children, one of us doesn't get what we want.  And with the status quo firmly in his direction where do I go from here?
I am partly angry at myself for being a woman that feels the need to get married and have children.  It seems that it not the cool thing to do to want to be a wife and a mother.  Is it so wrong to want to stand up and say that you choose to be with someone for the rest of your life, is it wrong to want someone to say I choose you above anyone, you are it for me.  Is it wrong to want to make something so unique as another person with the man you adore?
It's not just a wedding or a child, it's sharing it with the right person and I want to do that with no one other than the amazing man.  So the only conclusion I can come to is it isnt any guy, it's the right guy, the one I wake up to, the one I miss when I go to work and the one I fall asleep with at night, so I guess it's going to be not to breed and that is the answer to the question.